Tuesday, 13 January 2015

What's your job title?

My working life?
On the phone to the car insurance company:
Insurance elf: What's your husband's job title?
Me: Production supervisor.
Elf: That's not on my list. I'll call him Production Manager.
Me: Fine. I'll tell him he's been promoted.
Elf: And what is the nature of the business?
Me: He works for a company producing flavoured coatings for food.
Elf: Shall I put food company?
Me: If you like.
Elf: And what's your job title?
Me: I have two jobs, but the principcal one is book editor.
Elf: That's not on my list. Shall I put bookmaker?
Me: Not really the same thing. What else have you got?
Elf: Book binder?
Me: No.
Elf: How about publisher?
Me: OK, close enough.
Elf: And what is the nature of the business?
Me: I edit books. 
Elf: OK, I'll put publishing. What is your second job?
Me: Yoga teacher.
Elf: That's not on my list. Is it a sport?
Me, bristling slightly now: No. Have you got a 'Health and wellbeing' section?
Elf: Not as such. Tell you what, I'll put you down as a health care worker.
Me, with a sigh: Whatever you think is best.
Elf: And what is the nature of the business?
Me: I'm a yoga teacher - take a guess.
Elf, after a pause: Oh, I see. Got It. And you want your son on the policy, too? What is his job title?
Me, fighting the urge to say drummer in a rock band: Music teacher.
Elf: Ooh, I've got that on my list! And what is the nature of the business?

Needless to say, I have gone elsewhere for my policy.


  1. I laugh but with you, not at you. This is so typical of companies today - it's sad.

  2. That made me chuckle. When I say that I'm a holistic health practitioner it's normally met with silence and I have to ask if they're still on the phone! Health care worker is where they slot me too :-)

    1. Any of my family will tell you that I am definitely NOT a health care professional. My nursing skills don't extend much beyond plasters, paracetamol and asking 'Do you feel better yet?'

  3. Holy cow! After that I bet you needed a bunch of yoga and meditation too. Bureaucrats, red tape, ARGH! You really kept your cool. I'm not sure if I would have. Have a great weekend! :)